Oh, come on. You guys are so nasty sometimes. I’m not talking about the blog.
I was thinking about geographical cures this morning. How they’re only temporary and they may just prolong the pain that motivates them. Whether we change cities, states, jobs, relationships, meetings, programs or where we get our morning coffee…if change is inspired by the urge to get away from something we’re in for some rough times.
Instead of changing something, maybe what today calls for is stillness. Getting comfortable with whatever (or whoever) is at the root of our urge to up and run. In stillness we have an opportunity to be the detached observer. That means I can practice Step 11 by just watching the way I respond to the world around me without judging it. It’s amazing how powerful this practice is and how much freedom it gives me just to be human.
In detached observation I usually realize that I am unhappy with the way the show is coming off. I may begin to think that life isn’t treating me right. (p.61) I will almost always at this point exert myself more (that means I will mother, martyr and manipulate) in an attempt to ‘fix’ this perceived injustice.
I can always be more gracious and I can easily be more demanding. Of course I may have a part in some of my dissatisfaction with (fill in the blank.) But I think we both know you are a little more to blame. Before you know it…I’m angry, indignant, and full of self-pity. What is my basic trouble?
Am I not really a self-seeker?
That means I’m in it for me. I’m looking for what I can get out of it. I’m running the numbers, counting the beans, making sure it all makes sense….for me.
And even in my best moments…I can be a producer of confusion rather than harmony.
This little story is straight out of the Big Book. (p 61) There’s a particular speaker I love and her name is Sister B. In one of her talks she explains how the Big Book changed when she put herself in it as I have just done above. Next time you open it, try putting yourself in the story. It will change the way you interpret the message of Alcoholics Anonymous.
And take a little time today for stillness. Even just a few breaths can counteract our instincts to geographically change the way we feel.